Seeking God Together

Over the last decade of counseling Christian spouses whose marriages are in trouble, there is one thing that over 90% of them have in common. They’re not seek the Lord together. While many admit they pray to God, few pray together as husband and wife. The same can be said for reading the Bible. This is an interesting phenomenon considering many counselors and researchers today believe the greatest predictors of marital satisfaction among believers is praying and reading the Bible together.

Changing Negative Emotions

Do emotions dictate actions, or do actions determine emotions? While many people tend to believe certain emotions drive certain behaviors, researchers actually discovered the opposite. They suggest the fastest way to change an emotion is to modify the actions associated with the emotion. For example, changing one spouse’s displeasure to pleasure often occurs after the disgruntled spouse consistently serves the other with little or no expectations. Most of us realize how difficult this can be, so that’s why we have to draw strength from the Lord.

Assuming Positive Intentions

Some pop psychologists believe, “The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.” While this may sound logical at first, it is really a misguided oversimplification. For this to even be remotely accurate, every specific condition of the future situation must be exactly the same as the previous situation. Believe it or not, that’s difficult to achieve. In marriage, we at times allow the past negative behavior of our spouse to become default predictors of future outcomes.

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