Our Story - Matt & Sylvia
Being married is supposed to be one of the greatest joys God has given us; however, no pleasure comes without sacrifice and humbleness. We have been married for 13 years and the day we were married was the best day we had together for the next nine years. Silvia and I felt as though all was normal. We just needed to figure out how to live together, but soon it turned in to how do we manage being around each other. We were lost. We went to church most Sundays but were late almost every time. Every other day we lived a completely different life. The more we separated ourselves from Christ-focused advice and did what made us feel "happy," the further away we got from each other. I filled my time with drinking hanging out with friends and my emotional time with pornography. I pushed Silvia away and would always get angry when she was spending time with other people. It crossed my mind a few times that I may be hurting her, but my selfishness continued to get the better of me. We had our first son Levitt six years into marriage and thought that we would be better, but things continued to be the same. About two years later we had our second son Landry, again we thought this would make things better, we even made commitments to each other that we would change. What I didn't know is that Silvia was taking hers seriously this time and was recommitting herself to God. I continued to spiral and get worse we hit Rock Bottom, I hit Rock Bottom. We were one fight away from getting a divorce. It was time for a real change.
Silvia and I got involved in a local church. One that I was not thrilled about attending. Although it was not something I wanted to do, I knew if I didn't get help in some way shape or form, I would lose it all. Shortly after we started going, I felt as though God was calling me to recommit my life to Him. I thought to myself if God is pulling on Silvia's heart to give me another shot, one that I did not deserve, then I can give up my selfishness and humble myself for Him. It was not an easy road. I stopped drinking and looking at pornography. I stopped going out with friends and instead spent time with Silvia and in God's word. It seemed like things were getting better, but we what we didn't know is that it was just a band-aide. About a year after we started fighting again. We fought about silly things; I would complain a lot.
We soon found out that we could not fix this on our own. In came Strong Marriages. We had known about Strong Marriages for quite some time but never felt the courage to ask for help. Once we engaged in Strong Marriages, we started to make huge strides in our marriage. We found out more about ourselves and them more about each other. We got all of our secrets out on the table, and best of all we now have a wonderful mentor couple who has not only been through a lot themselves but has been mentoring for quite some time. Jesus can do all things to heal and repair our lives. Without Him, I don't know that five years of being sober would be possible, but God also blessed us with mentors that are fellow believers to walk with alongside us and to teach us. Strong Marriages gave us joy and hope and has helped heal our marriage and helps us understand how to communicate. We still have a long way to go but having mentors to guide us through a faith-based curriculum that convicts will undoubtedly help us continue to grow.
Matt and Sylvia
Parents to 3 boys, ages 6, 5 and 3